WEB DESIGNER NEEDED (READ AD CAREFULLY!)

Are you looking for a job that is not only exciting, interesting, and fun, but MOST OF ALL, pays good money? Then read this ad carefully, as it is guaranteed to change your life:

I have a job opening for a WEB DESIGNER who will help me improve my existing and future websites. Working alongside my team of web content staff members, he/she will be responsible for the overall look and traffic of my websites. This search is directed for someone who knows graphic designs and all the technical stuff that is required to create a successful website. Most especially, this person is VERY MATURE and RESPONSIBLE: one who does not run away from his duties and goes offline without a trace, swindling his/her boss behind.

Here are the requirements for the job:
1. You must know how to speak English.
- communication is important, so it would be a waste of time if we cannot speak to each other in English at all.
2. You must have a fast internet connection and no frequent power blackouts.
3. You must have accounts and access to ALL of the following: Yahoo Messenger, Skype AND MSN.
4. You must have a Paypal Account.
5. You must be able to work full-time which is 40 hours per week.

I am very much keen on details, and I am mostly particular about people who follow instructions. So, if you're interested and has strong confidence that you are the best fit for the job, do the following:
1. Send me your most updated resume, attached as PDF to an email with the following subject: "Amazing Websdesigner"
2. In your email, write a cover letter describing to me why you are qualified for this position. I don't need an enumeration of your experiences. I need to see how good you are in selling yourself as a candidate.
3. Include in your email the schedule that you prefer to work and when you are available for a possible live chat interview.
4. Include any links or attachments to your portfolio that will give me a better view of your past accomplishments as a web designer. (THIS IS A MUST!)
5. Lastly, I need your salary expectation.

Thank you.